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Denial is a harmful coping mechanism

Deny, Deny, DENY!

When someone says you're in denial, it usually means you are not being realistic about issues going on in your life. Denial is saying something hasn't happened or pretending the situation isn't as bad as it really is. Denial is a type of defense mechanism that occurs in reaction to a trauma or perceived threat. It allows victims to ignore painful aspects of reality. It allows abusers to continue to abuse. It is a coping mechanism, for victims, allowing them to continue living without accepting the truth that they are being abused. In denial...both the abusers and the victims are lying to themselves and to others.

The Lies of Denial:

* The victim deserves whatever abuse she receives.
* Victims provoke their abusers.
* Battered women are masochistic.
* Abuse doesn't happen to nice people.
* It could never happen to me.

The Reactions from Victims:

* Deny or minimize the abuse.
* Constantly blame themselves.
* Have very low self-esteem, which makes them even more vulnerable to their abusers.
* Have unexplained physical injuries, or the explanation seems implausible.
* Show symptoms of depression or anxiety.
* Display decreased concentration or sleeplessness and fatigue.
* Burn themselves out trying to please the needs of her spouse or family, while neglecting her needs.
* Cling to the promise that their abusers will change.
* Believe that if they stay long enough, they will be able to rescue the situation.
* See themselves as wives and mothers who should be nurturing, submissive and forgiving of their partner.

Denial is a form of repression, where stressful thoughts are excluded from memory.
 
Denial is an extremely ill and/or battered state of mind and can be tremendously difficult to break.

Denial can keep victims of abuse locked inside abusive situations and relationships for long periods of time.

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